There are these moments when everything seems to be suffocating you and no matter where you look nothing seems to be right. You try to think about why you feel this way but there are seemingly countless thoughts, all negative, going through your head and each seems to carry an unbearable weight. You think about an escape —go to a spa, binge eat, Netflix, smoke or drink, immerse in social media, and many others —but you are well aware that these things will bring more harm than good. So what are you supposed to do while in the sensation of drowning where every second seems to count?
Try these two things quickly: (First off, switch off your data/internet, close all browsers, and turn off your phone —If you’re doing this on your phone turn on Do Not Disturb or set all notifications off.)
1. Get everything out of your head and heart into paper/or your favorite note application. Title this list ‘EXCUSES’, there’s a whole lot of explanation as to why I suggest this title but that’s a whole different article and discussion. For now just let it be. Be brutally honest with yourself, don’t be afraid to admit faults and feelings that you have labeled wrong or inappropriate, just put it all out in that list (If you’re in this situation right now, stop reading this and do it).
You will be surprised on how simple and perhaps how few these things can be yet you feel that they’re so overwhelming and life ending. You see that these are actionable things even if it’s easier said than done. For example —“I’m a bad father as I don’t spend much time with my children as I’m supposed to” then spend some more f**king time with your children! Right?
But that’s another activity for another time. Right now we need to focus on you to turn these negative emotions to a positive ones.
2. Make another list, this time title it as ‘GRATEFULNESS’. Be as brutally honest, as f**k. List down everything good in your life from being alive to having, really, more than what you need. Focus and think! I have this on my list —“I am smart and intelligent… as fuck!!”
Notice your awareness as you immerse and focus more on these list and naturally neglecting the first one. Go over this list again and again to realize that these are the real things, and the other list is just merely an excuse to feel bad. I remember putting down in my excuse list that I am tired of doing everything for everyone, but when I came to my gratefulness list after looking down deep inside myself, I realize the truth that ‘tired’ isn’t a word for me let alone an option to be felt. I am a tireless motherf**ker and everything is just an activity. I am not climbing mountains and sh*t, I’m just doing and thinking simple stuff. That alone was enough for me to drop the sh*tty feelings and emotions and go forward charging with my life. Namaste.
An excerpt from zenhabits.net:
Simplicity as Spiritual Practice: Declutter for Deep Personal Growth
Posted: 13 Jul 2018 06:35 AM PDT
Approval: Lots of us try to buy nice things to impress other people — we don’t usually admit that to ourselves, but in the end, we want the approval of others. Maybe you buy a nice house with beautiful furniture, maybe it’s a hip old-school record player or an impressive sound system, maybe it’s a huge TV or the latest gadgets, maybe it’s minimalism that is more minimal than anyone else. In the end, it’s all about wanting others to approve. What if we just approved ourselves? Easier said than done, but the power to approve us is within us, if we stop looking for outside approval. Declutter to take care of yourself, for your own personal growth, not to get the approval of others. Do good things for yourself, and start to love yourself exactly as you are.